How to Fix Intermittent Errors

Today my four-year-old Mac G4 laptop began acting its age.

Groups of pixels jittered chaotically in horizontal regiments, sometimes covering the screen. Then, without anodyne application, the problem would disappear. And just as unpredictably, reappear. Further investigation revealed that these video measles increased or decreased as a function of manual pressure exerted on the case.

What I had was a screw loose…an intermittent error…notoriously hard to put right.

When I was in my 20s, I worked with an engineer who had a method for fixing such problems.

For any electronic device with an intermittent problem…

1) Measure the length, height, and width.
2) Add them together and multiply by two.
3) Hold the device that distance above a hard surface.
4) Drop.
5) Now the problem will no longer be intermittent.

Laptop, heal thyself!

Or else.